torn

I know a few of you are wondering what the hec I'm talking about. My posts are all very vague. Talking about things but never really specifying what the "problem" is, or what my real concern is.  Trust me that it's frustrating for me too. Some things are private and I obviously can't put it all out there for everyone to  read. It does help me though to write it down. I really am using this blog as my journal.

With so many inspirational quotes going around yesterday (after Steve Jobs' passing) it really made me take notice. Which one was speaking to me? Which one was I supposed to hear at that time? Which one applied to me? I seem to be doing that a lot lately. Looking for answers. Signs that tell me which direction I'm supposed to be heading towards.

Today I'm going to try something different. Instead of looking outward, I'm going to look inward. I suck at meditation but I am going to give it a try again. I will be still and quiet with my own breathing. I will listen to my heart, I will listen for God, and I will try to be open to the answers I don't want to hear. I will LET GOd! Wish me luck.

I'm promising another lighter post after this one. Maybe another list???Your suggestions are most welcomed!

feeling like taffy

I really need to start meditating. I need some quiet time to think about things. I've been looking up my dreams on "dream dictionary". I've been reading my horoscope every day, and my Chinese horoscope.I have an app on fb called "God wants you to know", and I'm sure Oprah was talking directly to me in her farewell speech. I have a desire to know everything right now! Obviously that is not going to happen. So I am heading back to the basics. A little quiet time in a comfortable spot to look deep inside and find out what the universe(GOD) is trying to tell me. Where am I headed, what should I be doing differently,etc etc. You know! The basics. I feel the pull so strongly that I am on the verge of something. On the edge of something big. Maybe not big for everyone else, but big for me! I can't quite describe it but I know it's there. This past year has been full of "AHA" moments and a million questions. So many things seem to be "speaking" to me but; I'm just not getting it!!!! Am I slow? Why can't I figure this out? Is it this difficult for everyone else? I know a lot of people struggle with this question, and never really get an answer. I feel like I'm so close!!!!!!!!!!!! Dang it! If any of you out there have any answers for me; feel free to send me your answers to my burning question of "what I am supposed to be doing with my life!" LOL Thanks